Outside Reading: Reflective Essay due 11/15/10

11/14/10

“An Open Letter to my Self Respect” by Cate Santilli

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/openletters/2selfrespect.html

In this reflective essay, Cate Santilli writes a letter to her self respect. The essay has a joking tone even though what she is writing is actually something that should not be funny. Santilli relates her life with brutal honestly. She does not pretend or hide what she has felt or done. This straightforward tone makes her seem very human because she is being completely open and honest about her thoughts, even if they are not the most flattering.

Santilli creates this jokey, open tone through the pretend act of writing a letter to her self respect as if it were its own entity. By personifying her self respect in this way, she removes herself from any responsibility of her actions. She places the blame on it, showing her reluctance to own up to her own decisions. She compares her sudden self-respect that came and left so quickly to a “cheap one night stand” that snuck out on her.

Usually, a reflective piece would show some insight of the writer and as a result, cause them to come to some sort of realization. In Santilli's case, she is fully aware of her lack of self respect and actively wishes it would remain absent from her life. She does not want to accept the fact that her life would be better with respect and would rather keep living her respect-less life. “I was perfectly happy degrading myself with a much younger 'friend with benefits' and reveling in my cougar-in-training status when you decided I deserved better.” This shows that she still has some maturing to do.

Santilli's essay makes the reader laugh. It seems that she uses humor as a way to deal with her life and what she has done with it. If she is not mature enough to want self respect, then it makes sense for her to write her essay in this lighthearted tone because she does not take it seriously. This tone makes the audience feel like they can relate to her because we are all human and make mistakes even when we know we are doing it. The last line of her letter sums up her essay perfectly. “Self Respect, I've managed without you so far and have only made questionable—rather than disastrous—life choices as my usual shameless self. So, like the rain, please go away, but do not come again another day.”

If this essay was submitted as an AP essay, it would probably score very low. This is because the language is too informal to score well. Also, it is written in rant-form instead of it being structured and well organized.